Anger is a feeling that we have all experienced at some time, and that is part of the most basic and essential emotions in the human being. Although on many occasions, it can be an adaptive feeling, the truth is that the vast majority of the time it can upset us and not help us achieve what we want, worsening relationships with others.
That is why we are going to give you some tips to control anger.
Controlling anger is not easy, so we must learn to identify it to be able to stop that feeling before it rises and becomes uncontrollable. Anger is something that can arise naturally, but the control of emotions is essential to improve relationships with other people.
Think before you talk
This is very important, because when we are arguing with someone or we have gotten angry about something, it is very easy to fall into a loop in which we get more and more angry. The feelings of anger will be there, and it is up to us to divert that feeling with other thoughts or feed it. That is why we must think before we speak. Increasing the other person’s anger is also not something that benefits both of us. Think about your words and if they are going to contribute something and how you are going to express them, since respect is fundamental. An assertive person knows how to express their feelings without having to hurt others.
Walk away to calm down
If you notice that you are getting very angry in an argument, it is always better to move away to be able to calm down. You can even go and go for a walk, something that will help you clear up. When we calm down, we see things differently, and we can express ourselves more calmly, offering points of view without getting angry with others. This is important, because as it is always said, two do not argue if one does not want to. If you have to get away at that time, express it like this and try to take a deep breath to relax. When you notice that you are calmer and that you can talk with the other person, then it is a good time to return to the subject.
When we are angry about something, we have a big energy spike that can be bad for us. It tends to increase tension and pulsation. It is a good idea that we exercise, at least in a moderate way, like going for a walk. This can help us use up that excess energy and feel much more relaxed. By being more relaxed, we can see things differently. Exercise helps us release hormones that calm stress and generate a positive feeling, something that will change the balance. If you do this, you will see that everything will seem different when you return to that subject that makes you angry.
Try to find solutions
On many occasions, we get angry about things without really looking for a solution. If something happens over which we have no control or that someone else has done, we should try to find a solution. This is undoubtedly the most important thing. And if there is no solution, we have to try to find ways to cope, looking for resources to avoid stress. Faced with a situation that makes us angry, we can let ourselves be carried away by anger, something that will directly harm us or, on the contrary, we can try to learn from it and adapt to the new situation as soon as possible, avoiding feelings that harm us.
It is difficult to accept certain situations, but the sooner we do it, the better for us. Anger is usually a feeling that can be valid at times, but in the long term, it does not benefit us.